Retreat

God, I really need to blog more often! Time has been flying by so quickly, that I lose track. Nothing really has changed since I last posted anyway, so it’s not like you’ve missed out on anything.

I’ve been trying to readjust my attitude as of two weeks ago. I’m surrounded by idiots and this is something that’s not going to change. I might as well accept it and stop caring.

I might have brought up the philosophy of ‘not caring’ before; letting things go or just going down with the ship, but it’s hard NOT to care because work, especially creative work, is a reflection of the person doing it.

On the other hand, where is the line? When does unnecessary bullshit and stress go beyond one’s paycheck or even their happiness?

Over the past month, I’ve been overcome with so confusion and frustration, I haven’t even been motivated. It’s been increasingly more and more difficult to get out of bed let alone care enough to come to work on time. People have been getting on my nerves relatively easily and I’m just not enjoying the day.

No job should be difficult. Challenging? Yes. Stressful sometimes? Sure, but difficult? No.

Last weekend, I decided that it’s nearing the time to look for another job. I really don’t want to have to uproot again, but I just cannot stay at this place if it’s going to always be like this and my patience is already running thin. That saddens me because I really like the area, I have made a few friends and I’m very comfortable in my apartment. What do I do?

Little by little, I’ll be updating my portfolios and my resume and preparing to get the hell out of there if things don’t shape up in the next couple of months.

Recently, my supervisor has been more and more concerned with my well-being as well as that of the department. Remember, my supervisor is not the director of the department (she doesn’t know what the fuck is going on). While my supervisor’s concerns are a nice gesture, they seem totally out of the blue because she couldn’t care less before. Where could all of this be coming from all of a sudden?

Well, a couple of weeks ago, I went to the VP’s office to ask her a question. When she opened the door, there was my boss and my supervisor looking like deer in front of headlights. It was literally the same day when my supervisor THEN began expressing her concerns about the department – a little bit too much of a coincidence if you ask me.

Whatever, I played along with it.
The VP later suggested that the designers go on a retreat to discuss workflow and how to make things run a bit smoother. We did that yesterday, and it was very productive and helped boost my morale significantly.

I opted to write a report on our recommendations, which will be shared with the VP and the director. Hopefully then, some things will be implemented to help alleviate the chaos.

All I really need is the unnecessary bullshit to drop off. I know there is bs in every work place. I know there are idiots, incompetent fools at every place of work, but it’s the unnecessary and excessive stupidity that makes it hard for me to do my job.

That’s where things stand now. I’ll post again next week.